As I’ve Aged

20140216-131535.jpg

As I’ve aged, I’ve become kinder to myself, and less critical of myself.

I’ve become my own friend.

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.

Whose business is it if I choose to read or write until 4AM?

I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60 &70’s, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love… I will.

I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the younger generaion. They, too, will get old.

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And I always remember the important things.

Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody’s beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.

As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think.

I don’t question myself anymore… I’ve even earned the right to be wrong.

So, to all those that wonder if age bothers me, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall thank God every single day for His grace and love.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen”
Jeremiah 29:11-12

Advertisements

I Know The Plans I Have For You

jeremiah 29 11

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Jeremiah 29:11

This verse offers me so much comfort.  In my moments of despair I remember that God has a plan for me, one that is filled with blessings.  My spiritual growth is a very important part of God’s will for me.  Knowing this gives me hope for the future.

Lord God, you are my strength.
Hold my hand in my weakness
and teach my heart to fly.
With you, there’s nothing to fear,
nothing to worry about.
Hold me tight in your embrace,
so that I can be stronger than
the challenges in my life.
Amen